Depression: The Problem of the Bed

Depression:  The Problem of the Bed  

  

Warm Hug for today:  You are special. You are stronger than you think.

Dearest Friend,

Years ago I read a book about grieving the loss of a spouse. One of the chapters was entitled, What to do About the Bed.  The subject is hugely important for people with depression. The bed is a real problem, I think we all agree; but let’s explore the topic in a different context. 

If you are over forty, you may remember the protest for peace that John Lennon and Yoko Ono staged from their bed. Only they could have the chutzpah to make a worldwide activist statement from the one place where usually we find private and personal refuge!

The bed event worked for John and Yoko for several reasons.  The obvious reasons, of course, were that whatever those two got up to was a world event, and second they were in the bed together. You see, there were two human beings in that bed...beings who were always there to support each other...always there to discuss whatever project they were working on...always there to cuddle and to give and receive love.  Many people don’t share the special bond that they rejoiced in. Even fewer have anyone to share themselves with in a lasting and intimate way.   You are the ones that this article addresses. If you are depressed and alone in the bed...get out of it!

The lie is that your cozy bed is a safe place...a place to rest...to get it together. If you are depressed, start looking at your bed as a utilitarian space for 8-10 hours of daily sleep.  Keep out of it...you are hurting yourself to be there. Note: If you have lost a spouse, take some time; think about whether or not sleeping in the same bed is really a good thing for you.  Be smart...you may need to change your sleeping arrangements. It’s okay to move on. Your partner would want that.

Wisdom: Get out of the bed!

Now that you have bitten the bullet, heaved a heavy sigh and looked at the problem of the bed; let’s talk about what you can do about it.

Following is a list of other things to do besides be in bed. This is not a bucket list. Try to keep moving. The old tired saying might just apply:  Fake it ‘til you make it!

• ·        Get showered, put on real clothes
• ·        Go to the cosmetics counter at the mall and try all the samples
• ·        Take a stroll. Even a slow walk gets your endorphins going!
• ·        Keep Bible Scripture cards or a Praise volume with you all the time. Read them throughout the day, keep some by “The Bed.”
• ·        Go to one of your safe places. I know you have them...places where you feel happy and secure
• ·        Take an easy class...even if it’s underwater basket weaving, it gets you out among the living
• ·        Adopt a cat. Cats are great pets for depressed people. They are loving and low maintenance
• ·        Start a planter...pick bright colors
• ·        Go to church.  It’s a great way to meet people and build emotional support
• ·        Serve lunch at a Help Center
• ·        Paint your nails, paint the dog’s nails!
• ·        Hit a tennis ball against your garage
• ·        Wash your car/wash anything...there’s satisfaction in seeing dirt come off!
• ·        Read a children’s story. Read a favorite with lots of pictures
• ·        Start a journal about the good things in life
• ·        Go to a music event. My community has a dulcimer group.

You get the idea here.  Enter the world. Stay away from the bed. Go through the motions if you have to until you get to a good place.  Remember the Disney movie, Finding Nemo?  Be like Dory, just keep swimming!

Say Aloud (People believe what they hear themselves say):   I will be better, stronger, whole...God loves me...I have a purpose in life! 

“But let all who take refuge in you be glad; let them ever sing for joy. Spread your protection over them, that those who love your name may rejoice in you. Surely, Lord, you bless the righteous; you surround them with your favor as with a shield” (Psalm 5:11-12 NIV).

I pray today that God’s love surrounds and protects you as with a shield!